We’re Born Astride The Grave

Do you know what that mean? It means that we are all dying the minute we are born. Let that sink in for a moment. Everyday we draw nearer to our grave. The other night my partner and I was watching Netflix, a show called Ozark, and there was a dialogue between a boy and this older gentleman that I can’t seem to shake. The man is struggling with some major health issues, COPD along with some other things, and only has about 18 months to live. The boy and his family is living in the old man house. How they got there is another whole ass mess of a story. Ozark had me rethinking life, but I digress..The old man is sitting outside overlooking this beautiful waterfront view, but he is hooked up to a portable oxygen tank. The young child looks out of the window and sees the old man sitting there. The boy approaches the man and asks, “Does it hurt?” The old man responds, “What?” The boy, “Dying?” The old man laughs and says “Life hurts.” They both chuckle a little and the boy adds, “Last year, a 12 year-old kid from my school died. He had cancer.” The old man responds, “Well, We’re born astride the grave. You know what that means?” The boy, “No”. The old man, “Sit down. It means that we’re all dying the minute we’re born. Goes fast. Don’t waste it. Don’t waste it.” Whew Chile… I had to rewind that scene to hear it again. It’s was like a slap in my face. A wake up slap!

How much of us are just here simply “wasting” it? How much of us are living our lives the complete opposite of how we truly want to live? It has become so easy to settle for the career, the relationship, that mediocre way of living, rather than making the choices that will create the person you would like to be and the life that you want to live. The majority of us are living a life based on the teachings and beliefs that are not even our own. We consistently choose the safe path because of that fear of the unknown. Sadly, a lot of us aren’t even aware that our lives hasn’t taken shape the way we initially sought.

In our teens or 20’s, we have in our minds the things we want to set out to do. Travel the world, backpacking through exotic countries and meeting new people, writing a book that will change the world. Coming up with ways that will help those who are less fortunate, the list goes on. Some of us may have started that book and is about a 100 pages in. However, years have passed and you’re still at 100 pages at the age of 36. Some may have started with their traveling endeavours but only managed to visit one or two countries from their list.

So now, we get to the part where it all went wrong for us. One of our greatest concerns is being stable. We seek to take on that graduated job/career, that will inevitably dictate our entire lives. That vicious 9–5 cycle we tend to unknowingly devote our lives to. Not only that, we also allow fear to creep in our lives as well. The fear, of what some may think of you, the fear of not being able to support yourself financially, the fear of being alone, let’s just keep it at the fear of the unknown. FEAR! False Evidence Appearing Real, F.E.A.R. Let that sink in for a minute. But for some reason, once fear starts to creep in, it becomes crippling.

Complacency is also something else we can put the blame on. I mean to be secure and comfortable feels good right? Seems like we are doing something right and should stay on that path when we get to that point in life, doesn’t it? But you see, what starts to happen is you subconsciously stop wanting to move forward in life and the advancement of self. It is the most detrimental but common mistake we tend to make. We forget that no matter if we want a extraordinary or just a normalcy in our career or personal life, we will always have to strive for more than what is comfortable. Sadly, most do not start to realizing this until its too late. We end up feeling too old and tired to start again or even on their death bed. Some don’t even get a chance to come to that realization at all. In my life, I have lost many people close to me and they always say the same thing, “I wish I did things differently, and followed my dream.” Maybe not in so many words, but its always something to that effect.

It goes fast… Don’t waste it…

Understand that life is a very precious gift and you only have one chance to live it right. Whatever it is that has been holding you back from doing the things you’ve always wanted to do, LET… IT… GO… Look at the world, at life like it’s a playground where you can learn, grow, connect, create and enjoy the time that you have left on this planet. It is never too late to press that reset button. The world has so much to offer… and so do you.

Do not waste it…

Sophia Tavares Barrett